A doctor tells a patient that she has three months to live. She asks, “Is there anything I can do?” He replies, “Yes, marry a tax accountant.” She is surprised: “How will that cure me?” The doctor says, “It won’t, but it will make those three months seem like an eternity.”

My apologies to tax accountants, but income tax deadline time is just ahead—so here’s my second annual pre-April 15 joke column. Apologies also to computer newcomers, one of whom was recently using a long password: “MickeyMinniePluto-HueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofy-Boston.” He chose that because it had to be at least eight characters long and include at least one capital.

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